What A Crappy Day

After laying around yesterday I guess my poor old body couldn't handle it. I had a complete melt down either that or eating onion straws at 9:30 at night was a bad idea. All was fine when I went to bed then I started having weird dreams. I was on a boat, the dream would flash and it would go from a big boat to a little boat to a raft, there was a huge storm and the waves were horrible. I was holding on for dear life. I could feel my feat slip under me and I kept falling down then it hit. I got seasick. With each wave my stomach got tighter and tighter. I leaned overboard and threw up. Ok here is the bad news it seems that overboard is really the left side of the bed.

Oh yes, I puked in bed, on my pillows, on my down comforter, on the cat who hates me right now. What a mess. I was puking and crying, the cat was shaking, thank god I didn't get a lot on him and he was pretty quick getting off the bed, the dog was in an uproar and in general it was just a mess. I got up, got a shower, got things cleaned up - NOT A GOOD TIME AT ALL - then laid back down for an hour until the alarm went off.

Well now did you know the alarm clock is also the retreat signal. Yup, as soon as the buzzer started my stomach cramped and anything left in me made a hasty exit from the rear door....in the bed....on my clean sheets...on my regular comforter because my other one had puke on it. I was not a happy girl. The only good news is I managed not to poop on the cat. I'm pretty sure he would have killed me in my sleep for that one.

Once again I got up, cleaned me up, cleaned the bed up and tried to feel better. I fell alseep for about 20 minutes then I was up again. This time I made it to the bathroom where I managed to do two things at one time. Try making that decision at 6:30 in the morning. You know you are going to have to clean something you just have to pick which one is going to be worse.

Needless to say I did not go to work today. I needed to. I need the money but there was just now way I could manage it. I did finally keep down about 57 gallons of pepto and some chicken broth. I feel hungry, woozie and still a bit strung out from the whole thing but I think I might just live. Either way I'm off to work tomorrow. I have found that the best way over a stomach flu is to share it with unsuspecting people so tomorrow I might just be overly affectionate and hug everyone.

If you are in St. Louis and see this demented woman asking strangers for hugs, just go with it. The worst that will happen is you will have a really bad boat ride.